Saturday, January 3, 2009

Where Have I Been?????

Have you ever been so overwhelmed with life that you just needed to write someone a letter or something just to "vent?" I guess that's how I am feeling right now. I obviously haven't been in blog land for a long while now, and frankly I sort of forgot about it!! Noone probably even checks back here anymore because every time they did nothing new was here!!! Oh well!!!

So in the past 2 months ALOT has happened!! I started my new job and we moved into a new house. I love my job, its only about 20 hours a week and I only have to leave Cayden for a little bit each day and he always stays with family, either my mom, caleb's mom, caleb, caleb's dad, and he has stayed with caleb's aunt too. I was working every day of the week from 10:30 to 3:30 but now I am not going to work wednesdays so I can be with Cayden even more!!! I just love my little boy to pieces and I can't stand not being with him!!!!!!!!!!!! I love the kids I work with too... they are soo much fun and I loved to see little victories everyday with each of them!

OK... now for the emotional part.... who would have thought that you could get so atattched to a house!!! Leaving our first home was one of the most emotional things I HAVE EVER DONE! Does this make me crazy??? I broke down so many times as we packed things up, cleaned, and finally drove out of the driveway for the *tear :'(* last time... On the bright side, a family from church is now in the house, so we left it in good hands, but all of my memories since I have been married have been at that home!! The hardest part for me was leaving the nursery that we worked so hard on for Cayden. I sobbed and sobbed when we cleared it out (I am even tearing up now, how pathetic!)!! We put sooooo much love into that room and I had imagined him getting big in there!! I remember the day I brought him home from the hospital and I brought him up to his room and rocked him and cried because I was SO Thankful to have a healthy son and I felt so blessed that I was just overwhelmed with emotion!!! I am really going to miss that! I was also so sad to leave our bedroom! It was the first room I shared with my husband... I won't go further ;) but I guess I get emotionally attached to some stuff!

We are now in our new house which is right on the water. I love the view, but the only problem is that I don't feel like I am at home. I feel like I am camping!! I don't know where a lot of things are... it's just not home. I know I don't have the right attitude right now, I keep praying that God would help me to have the right attitude as my husband is working SO HARD to make it beautiful (and believe me they are doing an AWESOME job... I'll post pics eventually-before and after shots--you won't believe it!! Its just that I MISS "HOME"... I know with time this will begin to feel like home, and one day Ill probably be just as sad to leave here too!

On the bright side, my inlaws live right next store which is nice... they love to help with Cayden and Caleb's dad has helped him with a TON of the work... we really appreciate all they do for us! My parents are basically right up the street... if you pull out of our drive way you can take just one road all the way to their street... and there is a nice view too. My family has helped us so much with the move... packing us up, loading and unloading, and fixing up the house for the new family to move in... I dont think we could ever repay our families for all their help!!! But I understand their desire to help... I would help Cayden with ANYTHING!!!

I know its winter out, and you think there wouldn't be much to do around here but we have the lake on one side and a pond on the other. For Christmas my mother in law got us all ice skates and yesterday we got to skate on the pond!!!!!! Then, last night, a bunch of guys came over to play hockey. It was a ton of fun! I know Cayden will have fun growing up here!!!

Look, now after writing all of that I feel a little bit better!!! Just pray for me that I will have the right heart attitude as we continue to fix up the house as we live in it.... it gets very messy VERY fast!!!!

Well I hope everyone had a great Christmas and New Years! Hopefully I will be on here more!!! Thanks for letting me vent!!

Until next post,

1 comment:

Jenna said...

So good to hear from you Hollie! :) What a whirlwind your life has been .You are not crazy. I cried when I had to pack up our house too! It was so hard. Hopefully things will settle down for you soon!

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